Late in July, our sweet golden retriever, Britty, started having health issues. We knew her kidneys were not doing so well for a couple years but she mostly wasn't phased too much by it. It wasn't until she started losing her balance and getting pretty wobbly on her back feet that we took her to the vet. In my heart, I knew it was almost time. She would have been 13 years old on October 14th but we let her go on August 12th. I don't have pictures of her in my August review because it was simply too painful of a time to want memories of her last couple weeks.
I remember when she turned 10, I felt she might leave us at any time, though I had no real reason to believe it. Having her in our lives for almost 13 years means she was with us through quite a few ups, downs, lefts and rights. Thinking back to when she was younger and what was going on in my life. I realize just how much of an impact she had on my life and it's hard to believe I have to move on without her.
In a sense, I know she is still with me. It is not one of the senses we use to taste, smell, see, hear or touch. It's spiritual - something you can't describe with words. In some ways, I feel stronger having her with me that way. In other ways, I feel empty, sad and dejected to not have her soft fur to nestle my face into or her sweet eyes to look in to. One thing I am learning, as I age, is that even though we can't experience all things at all times, having experienced something is enough to imprint it in our minds and we can relive those moments to the degree we choose to remember. Some people stash away memories of those who have left us because it is too painful to realize they are no longer here. I, on the other hand, want to honour and cherish those memories so I can relive them as often as I'd like. In a sense, memory is a human way of tapping into the infinite.
Rest in peace, my beautiful girl. (Photo of Britty and me courtesy of: Dustin Veitch.)
We weren't able to take our cameras into our local fair, this year. They told us any "professional" photography equipment was prohibited so we sold our tickets to a few folks heading in to the grounds and left. Neither of us had been to the fair for over a decade and we were really only wanting to take pictures at night of all the lights.
Instead, we climbed through a hole in a fence and crossed a busy freeway to get to the outer perimeter of the grounds and took some shots from there. I continued to experiment with double exposures with the Pentax K1000 and it definitely produced some interesting results. I'm very happy with the outcome.